Self-Image in the Modern Female

Okay, in an earlier post I did to some extent describe some of the issues I see in high school girls today. Namely, they feel animosity towards “pretty” females, and they can’t feel for one second that they are pretty. Either their hair is messed up, their shoes are too big, their hips stick out awkwardly, their ankles are too big, or whatever. There’s always something girls feel is standing in the way of their personal physical perfection, but whenever they “fix” it (if they can) another problem always arises. Saying that a shirt makes one look pretty good or okay (saying this about oneself, anyway) is for all intensive purposes a taboo and a sin. You become, if you reach that point of self-confidence, the girl who thinks she’s perfect. Now, instead of you pointing out your “flaws” and other people denying them, they point them out too.

I think cosmetics and weight loss are probably the biggest sellers to try to convince young girls that there’s something intrinsically wrong with them. Now, if a person needs to lose weight for medical or health reasons (or even just the want of fitness), that I understand. And makeup is great in moderation. But these girls spend an hour or more a day on their appearance. That borders on the absurd. Some ways to protest this outrage of “beauty” after the jump.

The way to convince others that they don’t have to buy anything or change anything about themselves to be beautiful starts with your own self-image. The best way, I find, to do this is to map out what you like about yourself. You can do this about once a week, and after the first time you can just build onto your original list.

1. Take a sheet of paper and a pencil or pen. Title the page any way you want: from something fantastical (like Iridescent Rainbow?) or something plain, or not at all.
2. Write a list of the physical parts of your body that you like or think are beautiful, strong, well-shaped, or whatever. The key here is to be totally positive. If you find yourself saying “But this and this aren’t,” then don’t write it down. I either start with my elbows or the backs of my heels, but start with whatever part of you that you like most. Keep writing them down. Maybe even just five a week. Just make sure you’re judging what you like by your own standards. If you’re trying to conform to how the world wants you to be you will never see yourself as good enough, and seeing yourself as good enough and better is the whole point!
3. Throughout the week, try to see your favorites in action. Think of how they serve your needs, and their purpose, and how they meet it so well. The important thing is not to take yourself for granted. Do you like holding your lover’s hand? Think about how well you can hold their hand with yours. Do you like hiking? Think of how well your feet, legs, and knees work together to get you going on the trail.
4. The next week (you really don’t have to wait a week, but whenever you feel like it…once a week minimum, I’d say), come back to your list, look over it, and remember the times you thought about each part. Now, add to the list. Think of other things you enjoy doing and what part of you allows you to do it. Or what limbs or digits or what have you that you just like the look of. It doesn’t matter why you like it, as long as you like it.
5. Repeat steps 3 and 4 until you like all of you.

The great thing about doing this is that you realize after some point that you were beautiful and powerful and wonderful all along. And with that comes the knowledge that there’s nothing wrong with you. You have no need to get that little bit of skin cream to get rid of that lone blotch on your leg or the stretch marks on your thighs. We are taught that these things are abnormal and that they detract from our beauty, but they don’t. They are a part of our beauty as human beings, and I for one don’t want to get rid of that.

Another thing–if you don’t really want to make a written list, you can just think or talk about it in the car or some other time when you’re not super-busy. I personally like whispering my list in the shower to the tune of Bob Dylan’s “Obviously 5 Believers.” Ciao!