Skirts & Sanity by 30-
A Journey towards Renewal, Reason & a Really Awesome Wardrobe.
Dec. 30, 2009
Here I am again, in a panic. Sheer alarm. It’s the end of another year & I am a another year closer to 30. Don’t get me wrong…it isn’t the age or the numbers screaming in my head when I think of it, but rather the position I’ve placed myself in, so far, in the muddle that is known as my life .
Currently, I am:
-29 yrs old. I have 8 months and 2.5 days left until I smack into my 30’s w/the grace of a gazelle or the sting of a wasp.
-a college non-graduate.I won’t even get into this. It just makes me batty thinking about my lack of progress.
- 332 lbs, the last time I checked (which was a week ago-up 15lbs from 2 weeks before that. This is also up 100lbs from the lowest weight I reached on a nationally broadcasted tv show several years ago…a story for another day.)
-a diagnosed, dr. supervised, medicated crazy person, who also has high blood pressure, migraines, thyroid issues, hormonal issues & joint problems…aaaaand insurance that runs clean out in 36 hours.
-has the good fortune of being able to say that I was a graduate of a local looney bin in the past year…and it only took me a little over 48 hours, grrrr.
-unemployed, with the exception of a few odd jobs that highschool teenagers could manage & sucking the tit of the gov’mnt unemployment benefits system, to my daily horror
- single & seeming to everlastingly stay that way, due to my complete lack of being able to
- the owner of a 1-eared cat, who is my only worldly possession & soul-mate so far & who doesn’t show signs of brilliant health on the horizon-ps…I own nothing else besides my ’03 Dodge Neon that has almost 145,000miles on it and is deteriorating by each simple word I type
-oh, yea, and almost $60,000 in debt
…any questions so far? If I wasn’t born nuts, I sure would be after all of this. Just re-reading this list makes me wanna jump off of something that has more than 7 stories…just so there is NO chance of me surviving, and then having those medical bills and p.t. to add to my self-made dibacle.
BUT moving forward, I am getting it together. My 30th birthday is on August 31st, 2010. I plan to have changed the majority of these bullets by that time, and also aquire a mighty fine closet full of clothes to fit my thinner ass in, by then, as well. Should I have started sooner? Sure. Would it have been more poetic to have begun on my last birthday? Absolutely. But just in my usual style, I didn’t.
So, this year & this here, is my journal. This is my mechanical conscience. This is my electronic accountability. My power-driven 2010 life in written & on display.
If people read this, I will be pleased, because I have enough problems/issues that most can relate to some of me & my messy existence…and GOD willing, find some shred of motivation from my plight. However, if no one reads this, I’ll pretend it is swarming the online masses, book editors are searching for my phone number as I type & Oprah is fighting Barbara Walters for my 1st interview. (ps I’m kidding about Oprah because I’ll never make it on her show no matter what…we’ve crossed paths, in a matter of speaking & no doubt would she NEVER give me the time of day now. Stay tuned.)
Anyway, come along with me, or not. Not sure how this will go, but come hell or high water (ps I don’t really understand that expression…does that make me stupid? Ah, shit, I don’t care.) I’ll complete, at least this blog. I’ll let you know the ups & downs, even when you’re screaming at your computer screens “TMI! TMI!” (too much information-my mom’s favorite saying). Nothing to lose at this point, but weight & bottled up frustration…thanks for stopping in.
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