You have no idea, you poor fools. So I went to the doctor on Friday because I had missed two periods (no i was not pregnant, seriously people, if i were pregnant you would probably the first to know, right before i began shouting it from the rooftops).
Girly health related stuff to follow (along with some humor) so if easily offended…jog on people.
I went in and had the usuall girly exam (always a pleasure) OK honestly it wasn’t that bad. The dude who did it was a nice guy, it wasn’t creepy at all, and unlike the last time it didn’t hurt a bit. The last time hurt a LOT and I was happy to discover that the guy who performed the last one was not working that day. Or perhaps it was his day at the hopital. I do not like him at all, he always makes me feel all nervous and uncomfortable without considering the painful papsmear.
Well anyway, he asked the usual questions, i asked him about what we can do about my late period. he asked me a few more pointed questions and i answered them. He ordered a thyroid check and prescribed me povera to get my cycles restarted.
I also got the lecture that i needed to lose weight. Seriously? I am ten pounds over weight but still. I had actually lost ten pounds since my last visit. Plus, dude, he was a gynecologist. Was i looking a bit chubby down there? Is that even possible? “No, i couldn’t possibly have another peice of cake, it goes straight to my pooter”
When i got home i let hubby know and he complained about the prescription. He said that the last time that I was on it, it made me cranky. I rolled my eyes. Sure it made me cranky, but i didn’t have much of a choice, now did i? So my mother in law took me out to lunch after my appointment. I ate delicious “bear food” from panda express and then i went to get my blood drawn for my test and then i went and got my povera prescription filled. I felt good at the end of the day. I had a lot of anxiety over my appointment and that was all past me. For the most part. I am still waiting for the results of my womanly exam and my thyroid screening but besides that, the worst is behind me.
or so i thought, dun dun dun!
So i started taking the pills. That night i got a massive headache. It felt like somebody had stuck a knife in my eye. But i figured it was because i was running on so little sleep. I went to bed and when i woke up the next morning…i was feeling insane. Really really insane. I felt like raging for no reason. I kept telling hubby to keep the baby away from me because i just was snapping at him all day for no reason. And after i did it, i realized that i was being stupid and irrationally reacting to the situation but i couldn’t stop myself. I just felt like i was filled with rage.
I tried eating something, in case it was low blood sugar. Nope, didn’t help. And food tasted funny, which only annoyed me more. So i went for a walk with Caleb, to get us both out of the house and into the sunlight. Perhaps some exercise would do us both good. No, everything annoyed me outside too. It was too hot, i didn’t like sweating, my shoes weren’t very comfortable, my bra rubbed the wrong way, the wind blew my hair in my face the wrong way. I came back from my relaxing walk more angry than when i left. So i came home and took a bath. Baths always relaxed me. Not today though. The temperature wasn’t just right. I put the music on too loud and when i went to lower the vollume i got water on the floor. Then caleb stood at the door and was yelling unhelpful reminders that i shouldn’t splash. I just sat there fuming until it was time to get out and get dressed.
I wore my favorite dress and even put makeup on (which usually makes me feel better) but nothing came out right. I had to run to the store to buy anti-static spray and some hose. When i told hubby i was going out for hose he started laughing so hard that he nearly fell out of his chair. I wanted to punch him, but i took a few breaths and walked out of the house. I bought chocolate while i was there. When i came back hubby had recovered enough to tell me that when i said i was going out for hose, he thought i said i was going out for hoes. *sigh*
so off we went to a birthday party. It was fun but the noise of the childrens was a bit much for me. I tried to have fun and it was nice, but i couldn’t decide whether i wanted to hang out with the girls or if the estrogen was too much for me and i needed to be near the manly men (who sat around eating turkey legs right off the grill like barbarians, LOL)
we got home late and even though we had an guest over, i very nearly went straight to bed.
Sunday was a lot better. I got a headache again, but besides that it wasn’t so bad. We went to church, had bbq for lunch (i am so tired of meat now, you have no idea) I stayed up late with my friends after hubby took Caleb home, so i got a nice break away from the kid. got some adult time in.
Today…is just as bad as saturday. I am so so cranky. I have raging PMS right now. You have no idea. Caleb doesn’t know when to stop. It has taken all my self control not to sell him to the neighbors. I went looking for a book this morning because i wanted to quote it in my myspace blog and i threw a ridiculous hissyfit when i could not find it. Caleb keeps telling me i’m making him sad because i yell at him. I told him i’m sorry but that he needs to be good because i’m in a bad mood. He goes to his room and 20 minutes later comes out to tell me “NO! No mood, Mommy!” and i couldn’t decide whether i wanted to choke him or laugh, so i went into the bedroom and cried about it for a while.
Then i went online and bought myself some pretty, even though we’re short on funds right now. I got the boxed set of the twilight series. Even though i already own it…but not the boxed set. Plus these are all in hard cover…
Seriously, i’m not usually this crazy. Or at least i don’t think i am. I called my mom, but she was telling me stories about how she knows how i feel because she had a same reproductive problems i’ve been having. She had a hysterectomy at 35, that isn’t the best news. So then i called my mother in law and she talked me down. She asked if i had prayed and i told her I didn’t, and she told me that it would help. She also told me to put on some christian music too. I didn’t even think of that. When i hung up i was so mad that i had missed to obvious answer, and then started crying because i was just so happy to have someone like my mother in law in my life.
The plan for today is to go out somewhere with my mother in law, so that i can be somewhere with witnesses. I think i could hold myself together better in public. or at least that’s the plan. I might just start sobbing in the waiting room of the allergy institute.
Povera is The Devil.
Pray for me, seriosly. I think i’m losing my mind.
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